I came in to work today to discover that out of respect for the frightful weather that may potentially soon be brought on by the icepocalypse preparing to descend upon the Southwest, the library will be closing early today and closing outright on Friday and Saturday. As a veteran of Texas ice “storms,” I was naturally skeptical and so consulted the Weather Channel’s website. As it turns out, chances are good we’ll be getting freezing rain and a “wintry mix” brand of precipitation throughout tonight and early tomorrow. Fair enough.
During my practical weather investigation mission, I thankfully also came across some amusing nonsense, which is always welcomed and appreciated in my universe. Apparently, this almost-certain-to-be-historically-insignificant storm system has been given a name, and as if that in and of itself isn’t ridiculous enough, get a load of the name: Cleon.*
Por que, storm naming people? Why in the world choose Cleon?** Who is Cleon? A quick Google search let me know that Cleon was an Athenian statesman. I then moseyed over to the shelves and picked up Who’s Who in the Greek World to learn more. The most interesting tidbits I picked up about Cleon were that he loved putting people to death, he was quite the warmonger, and Athens achieved peace with Sparta pretty much right after he died and could no longer obstruct it. In light of that information, Cleon sounds like a pretty apt name for a storm; while it’s here, it will aggressively agitate us and disrupt our lives, but once it’s gone, sunshine and peace will be restored.
So, hats off to you, storm naming people. The library has once again aided in stamping out ignorance and shown me that there is a method to your seeming madness, unless of course this particular name was nothing more than a fortuitous coincidence. For now, I’m going with the former, but if we soon see Winter Storm Dandelion, we’ll know it was the latter.
*My sincere apologies to anybody named Cleon.
** Again, very sorry, Cleons of the world.