Benbrook Library / Books

The Dating Game, Book Style

*Extremely ’70s game show music plays*

Hello, and welcome to “Undercover Lover,” the only dating show that helps avid readers find a match with eligible book bachelors and bachelorettes. I’m your host, Skip Winkendale. Let’s meet our contestant, Ivana Goodolebook.

IG: Hi, Skip.

SW: Ivana, we’ve got three wrapped mystery books vying for your attention. Ask them whatever you’d like, except for anything that would force them to reveal their titles or authors. No sneaking a peek at their covers, either! At the end of the show, you’ll select one lucky book to take on an all-expenses-paid trip to your favorite reading chair, couch, or bed in your house. Are you ready to get started?

IG: Let’s do it, Skip. Bachelor #1, I want a book I can really have fun with. How to you like to spend your free time?

B #1: I pretty much like doing whatever my human wants to do. As long as I can be with them, I’m happy. Oh, and smelling stuff. There are so many interesting smells in the world! Do you like to smell?

IG: Uh, yeah, smelling is…neat. Hey, bachelor #2, I’m not just about leisure; I like a book that’s into making me work mentally, too. Do you feel like you could do that?

B #2: All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

IG: Touche. Bach-

B #1: Did he say good boy?! I’m a good boy!

IG: Oh, I’m sure you are. Such enthusiasm! Bachelor #3, my ideal book is one that’s infectiously passionate. What are you passionate about?

B #3: Well, I really love books and bookstores. Almost as much as I love technology. And secret societies.

IG: Ooh, I don’t know about secrets. You’d never keep secrets from me, would you?

B #3: No way. I’m more into working together to solve secrets and puzzles.

IG: I definitely like the sound of working together. Bachelor #2, does that sound good to you?

B #2: All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

B #1: I’m a good boy!

IG: Right. Now, when it comes to reading partners, I don’t discriminate based on age, but just out of curiosity, how old are each of you?

B #3: I’m seven.

B #1: I’m nine, or 63, depending on what type of years you use.

B #2: All work and no…ahem, pardon me. I’m 42.

IG: My, my, I’m having just the hardest time deciding! Skip, can I pick all of them?

SW: Hmm, that doesn’t violate any rules, except for the ones I explicitly laid out in the introduction of the game. It’s in the name of reading, though, so what the heck, go for it, you crazy kids!

IG: Thanks, I can’t wait to unwrap my dates and get between the covers!

SW: *Nervous laughter* Hey now, this is a family-friendly program. For all you readers out there, if you’d like to rendezvous with a mystery book or three of your own, check out BPL’s “Blind Date With a Book” display this month. We’ve got a stable of suitors wrapped up and ready to choose from using only their dating profiles as your guide. Your next great readmance is waiting for you at the library.

*Outro music plays. Skip, Ivana, and the books blow kisses to the camera.*

 

Identities of the mystery books: Bachelor #1 – A Dog’s Purpose; Bachelor #2 – The Shining; Bachelor #3 – Mr. Penumbra’s 24-Hour Bookstore

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